posting teh olde… 3

August 16, 2007 at 10:56 pm (poem)

12.07.07

need
words all crammed
waiting to leave
condmened to wait
until time time is right
but it’ll never be so
quiet moments spin
bite and scratch
do you
see me
do you know what is
happening?
do you even care?
I don’t blame you
I simply can’t
if you mind your life
that’s what you should do always
but just
dear one
stop hurting me
I know I’m mean
I’m quiet
and leave you alone with no clue
but it’s so much pain
I just can’t
face the idea of you getting hurt as well
if you aren’t already
I don’t know
shrouded by another life
that’s how you seem
snowblind in sunlight
please
if you get a message
saying just “help”
what would you do?

This is not what I wanted
or what I hoped for
this is what I feard most
I did not change
mind what you said
I just fell
and everything I see and hear
is transformed into something that hurts
and I thirst for relief
but there’s no way again
you know this
it’s the way I was when I met you
I don’t want this to happen again
I don’t
I’m so weak it sickens me
and all the time I just say me
it’s all about me again
egomania
fuck this
sorrow
I just….
I just…
no…

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